Rules are made to be broken, but before you can break them you need rules

It would seem there are more rules involved in writing that international diplomacy and the Highway Code combined. Rules are good if you don’t know what you are doing. I cling to rules like a non-swimmer to the edge of a pool. My shelves groan with Style Manuals.

I have even taken to writing a few of my own rules.

Here is one example. Omit the adjective if the antonym is ridiculous. Brutal murder (pleasant murder). Vicious assault (gentle assault). Serious war crime (trivial war crime). Vile attack (decent attack). Appalling rape (delightful rape).